Are You a Working Adult
Updated: Nov 1, 2019
Are you tired and rundown? Are you suffering from periodic bouts of aggression and depression? Are you overworked, underpaid and overloaded with responsibility? If so, you may be suffering from a common and treatable condition known as, Lifesucksitis. Symptoms of Lifesucksitis include; fatigue, irritability, anxiety, depression, insomnia and overwhelming urges to scream at stupid people. In extreme cases there have been documented cases of a desire to smack them.
If you feel you are suffering from Lifesucksitis hope is upon the horizon. An inexpensive prescription of ChilzplA has been clinically proven to improve symptoms and often cure Lifesucksitis when taken as prescribed.
By regularly taking five specific doses of ChilzplA weekly, you will experience laughter, joy, improved mobility, increased energy and a more pleasant work atmosphere.
Monday ~ Unroll a tube of wrapping paper for future use of said wrapping paper. Take cardboard tube or multiple tubes to work. Proceed to bop coworkers with tube throughout your workday. When taking multiple tubes, toss the extra’s to coworkers as you challenge a, “King of the office” sword fight.
Tuesday ~ Randomly tag coworkers throughout your workday in passing while yelling, “You’re IT!”
Wednesday ~ Bring in a helium balloon or helium balloon tank with bag of balloons to pass out to everyone in the office. Use said helium balloon as a stress relieving punching bag and see how many times you can successfully hit it in a row in a 60 second timeline. When this grows tiresome, inhale helium while yelling at your coworkers, “SANTA’S WATCHING GET BACK TO WORK!”
Thursday ~ Invite coworkers to purchase a cheap pillow to be left at the office for a Thursday office pillow fight. If no one joins in the fun, bring your own and simply beat said coworkers with it for being butt munches.
Friday ~ Initiate a game of leapfrog every time a coworker is crouched down to tie their shoe or picking up a dropped item.
Occasionally serious side effects have been reported while taking ChilzplA. DO NOT CALL your doctor immediately if you experience uncontrollable laughter, weight loss or bouts of euphoria as these may be life extending side effects.
Do not take ChilzplA if you are just starting a new job, you do not enjoy laughter and happiness, or you are simply an ass.
Brought to you by poetry author Kat Copeland who has no medical experience whatsoever.
Prescribed with love,